The First Book of Collin Chapter 2

First Collin Chapter 2 (May 27, 2013)

And it came to pass that in the second week of the time I did spend within the CCM that many things were done. For my first companion did go back unto his house, having much penance in his soul, and at this day he doth intend to return. And for the time being, I have been placed into a trio, which we refer to as the trinity of elders, for we did go forth with much power in the Lord.

And I and my brethren did wax strong in the speaking of the Spanish language; for the more part of the day we do speak Spanish, and we are taught after the language of this land, and we do understand the most part of what we hear.

And also did we eat exceedingly well, because of those here willing to aid our cause. And oft we did eat that which was strange to us, but though great prayer I did bear the burden of the peculiar food, insomuch that I did come to enjoy it. But of the more part of the fruits, and of the guac, and of the more part of the products of dairy, I did continually not eat. And upon one eve we did eat of steak and potatoes. And the steak thereof was exceedingly thin, being about the thickness of a cardboard box. But it was delicious to the taste, and the potatoes and gravy also were exceedingly delicious. And there was much rejoicing.

And I believe somewhat that there be confusion about the juice of which I have spoken. And also of the sangre de diablo. And the jugo de muerte, which is to be understood as the juice of death, is that juice which is made fresh of the fruits of the country. And of this it is expedient that man should not drink. For whosoever drinketh of that juice, the same shall bring upon himself the great and terrible reckoning of el baño. And also there is other juice, made with real sugar, which is very delicious and desirable to the taste. And the sangre de Diablo is an extraction of the more powerful part of the Ghost Pepper. And I have tasted of the sangre de diablo, and my very soul was swallowed up in anguish. And I did drink much, but I could find no relief. And for many minutes I did suffer thus, that I might understand that it is not expedient that the sangre de Diablo be had by man.

 And I would speak somewhat unto you concerning the great joys that we have found in bonding with our brethren here, both Nortes and Latinos. For we have taught much of our language unto them, even unto our great pleasure. And the gringo being called Elder Wyatt did teach unto them our phrases ¨Do you even lift¨ and ¨Come at me bro¨, and we did revel much at the fruits of his labors.

And also, one of my companions, Elder Refuerzo, and myself, did commence in somewhat of a boasting of skills. Wherefore, we did go forth among our fellow man in the CCM, and we did take the tags off of their very shirts. And this we did without their knowledge, that they might wonder wither their name tag hath gone. And we did become well practiced in this manner, and did steal away the name tags of many. And as of this day, there are few among us who know of our challenge, and we do continue in such jokery.

 

 And it shall come to pass that on the morrow I and my brothers shall go without the gates and without our hired sentries, and go forth unto the market, that we might immerse ourselves in the culture, and buy that which we require, and perhaps bring a few souls unto the fold of Christ. And in this I do rejoice much, for of soap, I am nearly without. And also I do desire protein powder, that I might become shredded and huge, like unto the Nephite captains of old, depicted in paintings.

 

 And thus I make an end of my speaking for now. And I wish those of my family, and of my friend’s good tidings. And I would that those not of my city, who would soon endeavor to serve the Lord would read the words which I have written, and become excited at the prospect, for it truly has been a blessing.