And it came to pass that in the second week of the time I
did spend within the CCM that many things were done. For my first companion did
go back unto his house, having much penance in his soul, and at this day he
doth intend to return. And for the time being, I have been placed into a trio,
which we refer to as the trinity of elders, for we did go forth with much power
in the Lord.
And I and my brethren did wax strong in the speaking of the Spanish
language; for the more part of the day we do speak Spanish, and we are taught
after the language of this land, and we do understand the most part of what we
And also did we eat exceedingly well, because of those here
willing to aid our cause. And oft we did eat that which was strange to us, but
though great prayer I did bear the burden of the peculiar food, insomuch that I
did come to enjoy it. But of the more part of the fruits, and of the guac, and
of the more part of the products of dairy, I did continually not eat. And upon
one eve we did eat of steak and potatoes. And the steak thereof was exceedingly
thin, being about the thickness of a cardboard box. But it was delicious to the
taste, and the potatoes and gravy also were exceedingly delicious. And there
was much rejoicing.
And I believe somewhat that there be confusion about the
juice of which I have spoken. And also of the sangre de diablo. And the jugo de
muerte, which is to be understood as the juice of death, is that juice which is
made fresh of the fruits of the country. And of this it is expedient that man
should not drink. For whosoever drinketh of that juice, the same shall bring upon
himself the great and terrible reckoning of el baño. And also there is other
juice, made with real sugar, which is very delicious and desirable to the
taste. And the sangre de Diablo is an extraction of the more powerful part of
the Ghost Pepper. And I have tasted of the sangre de diablo, and my very soul
was swallowed up in anguish. And I did drink much, but I could find no relief.
And for many minutes I did suffer thus, that I might understand that it is not expedient
that the sangre de Diablo be had by man.
And I would speak
somewhat unto you concerning the great joys that we have found in bonding with
our brethren here, both Nortes and Latinos. For we have taught much of our
language unto them, even unto our great pleasure. And the gringo being called
Elder Wyatt did teach unto them our phrases ¨Do
you even lift¨ and ¨Come at me bro¨,
and we did revel much at the fruits of his labors.
And also, one of my companions, Elder Refuerzo, and myself,
did commence in somewhat of a boasting of skills. Wherefore, we did go forth
among our fellow man in the CCM, and we did take the tags off of their very
shirts. And this we did without their knowledge, that they might wonder wither
their name tag hath gone. And we did become well practiced in this manner, and
did steal away the name tags of many. And as of this day, there are few among
us who know of our challenge, and we do continue in such jokery.
And it shall come to
pass that on the morrow I and my brothers shall go without the gates and
without our hired sentries, and go forth unto the market, that we might immerse
ourselves in the culture, and buy that which we require, and perhaps bring a
few souls unto the fold of Christ. And in this I do rejoice much, for of soap,
I am nearly without. And also I do desire protein powder, that I might become
shredded and huge, like unto the Nephite captains of old, depicted in
And thus I make an
end of my speaking for now. And I wish those of my family, and of my friend’s
good tidings. And I would that those not of my city, who would soon endeavor to
serve the Lord would read the words which I have written, and become excited at
the prospect, for it truly has been a blessing.
was the airport/plane/bus to the CCM (The Guatemalan Missionary Training
Well the plane
was incredible! Flying out of LA at midnight we could see the city lights going
for MILES. And then when we got to La ciudad de Guatemala in the morning it was
almost as incredible! The scale of both cities is crazy! They are huge!
On the bus to
the CCM I saw a guy on the back of a motorcycle holding a sawed off shotgun
dressed up in a suit. And usually once per day we see a policia truck with a bunch
of armed guys in the back, but haven’t really seen any problems yet.
us about the food
The food has
been alright so far, it kind of a North American and Central American
hybrid. For example, on the first day we had scrambled eggs with nacho cheese
and peppers on top. Some days we have American food, some days it’s completely
Central American. Most days we have rice, beans, or both. I have gotten to
really enjoy rice and beans. J
your daily schedule like?
They keep us
super busy here, like all day, every hour is planned out to have some thing
that we are doing, or learning, or eating. My Spanish has come leaps and bounds
from what it was. I have 2 Latinos in my room with me and my companion, and I
can have a pretty good conversation with them after just 6 days. My companion
didn´t have any Spanish before this, but he already knows enough phrases to
survive, and he gets better every day.
us about your companion and the city?
Elder Reynolds (That’s his American name, his Latino name is Elder Reynaldo) is
pretty cool, he´s from Utah. We have been able to go out of the CCM a couple of
times. We went to the temple yesterday, and we have gone to the small computer
lab here a couple times, which is off the CCM grounds, to use a Spanish
language learning program.
The city here
is so exciting, and I can´t wait to get out and see it all! I would not want to
drive around here ever. There are so many YOLO´s everywhere. They just pull out
and floor it to get onto the roads, because there is always traffic, and at
least around here there are no lights. But there haven´t been any accidents
yet, so todo está bien.
Here’s what I’ve
bought this week: A “Team Guatemala” soccer jersey, leather scripture case
with awesome pictures, leather wallet, and a local style back pack with my name
on it.We are going to the open market
next week, and Walmart the week after, so I will be able to feed my shopping
I´m excited to be here, and I miss everyone. I sent some snail
mail, but I don´t know when it will get there. It looks like Tuesday is my
P-Day, but there are about 200 people here, so they have to schedule the
E-mailing time differently sometimes, so I don´t know when I´ll have the chance
again. I will let you know when I find out what my regular time is.
it came to pass that I did travel many hours to the land of Guatemala, that I
might teach the people to more fully understand the gospel. And also many other
gringos did go up with me unto the land of the Central Americans. And we did
rejoice much, that we might have the privilege to be in the service of our
fellow man. And when we did arrive thither, the leader of the missionaries in
the land did address us, that we might more easily make ourselves accustomed to
the things which the people did do, and did eat.
the first thing he did tell unto us was concerning the juice. And he did say
unto us that we mayest freely drink of all of the juice, but of el jugo de
muerte, (local juice?)thou mayest not eat. But it is given that you
may choose for yourself whether you should drink there of. But remember, in the
day thou drinkest thereof, thou shalt surly suffer much affliction in the
bathroom, and die.
like wise he did say unto us, wherefore, the Latinos find great pleasure in
giving of el snagre de Diablo (mega hot sauce?) unto us the gringos, but
thou ought to remember in thine heart that he who partaketh of el sangre de Diablo,
which is to mean the blood of Satan, shall be harrowed up with much
afflictions, and it shall seem as if his very soul doth burn as if in the
endless torment of the fire and brimstone.
I did partake of el snagre de Diablo, and I did suffer much for want of ice cream,
but there was none in the land, save it be immediately after either lunch or
dinner. And I sorely afflicted, even with a curse upon my tongue, insomuch that
I was brought to a remembrance of the words of the mission president, and I did
choose in that day not to partake of el jugo de muerte, for such it was called
by my people, the Nortes.
my companion and I, having been taught somewhat concerning the Spanish language
did go forth, and did cry repentance boldly unto one of these the native
people. And we did labor much. Even a hard labor, that we might bring souls
unto Jesus Christo and unto baptism.
there was one among the people of Guatemala that did hearken unto our words, and
did commit to become baptized. And she was called Alejandra. For she did speak
even after our own tongue, therefore we did teach her in both our languages,
and she did hearken unto the words which we spoke unto her. And thus we did
converse with her.
we did converse also with those Latinos which were with us in our rooms, that
we might come to a more full understanding of the language. And also we did
teach unto them many things concerning our own culture and language. And we did
teach unto many Latinos how they might utter the phrase "Do you even lift?" and many Latinos did go forth and ask
such to those Nortes which were not of our district, and we did rejoice much in
And it came to pass that there were among the
Nortes that were not of our district that did curse us because we had done
this thing, and also that we had taught unto our brethren, the Latinos,
how they might sing the song “Trolololo”,
which might be found on YouTube or by asking mine brother Jared. And the Latinos
did sing this during all the day, and especially so in the shower, even
insomuch that many Nortes did curse us and did speak unto us saying: "What
is this thing thou hast done?" for they were sorely afflicted by the few
phrases we had taught unto our brethren.
thus I make and end of my speakings, and I do desire that I might receive many
letters concerning the events of my homeland and of my family, for I have a
sore want for the things of my home.
I must now go up to the classroom everlasting, that I might spend eternity in a
classroom learning all the day long. And it doth bore me much, and I look
forward with much want to the day in which I might leave the gates of the CCM
and wander upon the city.
I do write these things that thou mayest know that it is desirable that men
might serve a mission, and much joy can come of it. Amen.